Starting Out Slow

Again, I don't need to remind anyone that things have been busy at work over the past few months. I've been busy, but I haven't been alone. Everyone has been busy and swamped and overwhelmed. It simply goes with the territory of the last few months in publishing. There is always a push to get things finished before the year is over. But in spite of the fact that we all had some time off and took some vacations, very few of us are ready to be back at work. This particular week has felt strange, because we came to work on Monday, but had a holiday on Tuesday because of New Years. Then we were all back to work on Wednesday. The week feels out of sorts, and no one really knows what day of the week it is.

It seems as if the project editors are having an especially hard time getting back into their grooves. This afternoon a few of us made some impromptu plans to go to happy hour this evening. We picked our restaurant and then sent an e-mail to everyone in our department that we were going to happy hour at 4:00. Fortunately we have a boss who won't object and who will let us do these kind of things. We went out and we each had a few drinks. We didn't go crazy. We simply got together, talked, tried to decompress, and tried to psyche ourselves up for the work that we all have to tackle.

I parked in my "secret parking spot" that happened to be a few blocks away from the restaurant. I walked along Pearl Street which is a pedestrian mall in downtown Boulder. It was relatively quiet because school is still out and the students haven't returned yet. Normally I like seeing activity and I like seeing people on Pearl. But it was nice tonight to have a quiet setting. There were families and couples but none of the craziness as when the students are out on the town. It was already dark and the holiday lights on the lampposts were still lit up. People were skating on the ice rink on 13th between Canyon and Walnut streets. It was about 45 degrees, but it didn't feel cold. If a few snowflakes had fallen from the sky, it would have given that feeling of a setting in a movie. But I'm hardly a movie star...

Normally with such a setting you would think that I would get really serious and pensive, thinking about the world, myself, my future, etc. I didn't have much of that. In fact, I didn't have any of that. For once there weren't any thoughts racing through my mind. There was just...silence. Maybe this was good for a change. Sometimes I think too much. Sometimes I feel too much. My thoughts and emotions tend to consume and control me. So I suppose that the silence that I felt tonight brought me back to an entirely different place. And with a deep breath of the cold air, it brought me back to some kind of centered place. A place of quiet and peace without any kind of outside (or internal) noise. It was nice.

And, yes, right now and in this moment I am back to my old self of analyzing everything. But in this particular moment, it seems to feel like it is coming from a different place. I don't know what this means. I don't know if I'm making sense. And I don't know if it can be explained.